deff haven’t eaten in the past two days.. but I’ve been getting tan. soooo at least ill be tan and skinny. maybe ill find myself beautiful and sexy.. I wish I could say I got that way in a healthy way.

I can’t handle myself any longer. I’m beyond depressed, I’m worse than I was when I came out with my depression to my mom. I’m to the point of crying every goddamn day. The smallest things can set me off. I can’t tell my friends or my boyfriend about this. Well simply because if I went into full detail of how depressed I am, people would think I was crazy and leave me. Maybe thats what I want though. To be left alone, to figure myself out, to cry everything out to the point I have nothing less to cry about. Or maybe till I just die.